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(See FREE YouTube guided practice/attunement on self-forgiveness here)

Are you trying to forgive yourself for something you’ve done? Or maybe you’re trying to forgive someone else. And try as you might, you still feel that hot emotional charge inside, that anger, guilt, or shame that keeps your life force limited and your heart tightened when you think of this situation.

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How can I get myself to forgive myself?

How can I convince myself to forgive another when I’m still so hurt?

And do I even have to forgive to heal from this?

These are questions that I’ve been getting from clients in my Primal Trust™ Mentorship as we work through core wounding that results in chronic illness. I see so many struggling trying to intellectualize forgiveness or trying to spiritually bypass their hidden emotional conflicts through seeking forgiveness.

I pondered how to answer these questions, and through some reflection of how I’ve experienced “forgiveness”, I came to the following conclusion.

Forgiveness happens TO you.

And also maybe forgiveness doesn’t even mean what our ego thinks it means…

I see people trying to “forgive” because they are told that is what they should do in order to heal. Or forgive because that is the “right” thing to do.

I would offer another way through this inner push-pull of trying to forgive. What if you focused on letting go of the resentment and hate… and allowed forgiveness to come, if that is what the byproduct is? I am implying that by neutralizing the emotional charge of anger, guilt, or shame you can improve your own vitality, which might be the best first approach to “forgiveness”.

This release of resentment and hate provides a deep energetic relief within your own body and heart field and will allow you to view the situation from a different perspective. And maybe compassion, grace, or forgiveness will pour into you as those old emotional charges are neutralized, rather than making yourself forgive if you don’t want to do or aren’t ready to.

How have I learned to let go of the energy of resentment and hate that I have had towards myself or others?


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Acceptance that what happened, happened.

Acceptance that I did what I did, they did what they did.

Acceptance that now, in this current timeline, it is my responsibility to live life in the best way I can and to create healthy boundaries with others if needed, but I don’t need to hate or resent anyone for the past. And through acceptance, I have noticed this subtle energy seep into my being over time. I would call it grace mixed with compassion. And that is what I think “being forgiven” feels like.

Getting into acceptance is quite a path of transformation, and I’m still learning about the depth of what acceptance actually means. I use different tools and strategies to help others create inner solidarity through deep self-acceptance. My Primal Trust™ Mentorship gently escorts you on that journey into the heart where eventually grace, compassion, and maybe even forgiveness can be experienced.

I am gifting you all a free excerpt from my online community where I recently took the group through a guided brain rewiring attunement to help create self-love/forgiveness.

Here is the YouTube link to the self-forgiveness attunement

Sending you all love and compassion. Living human life can be difficult sometimes. We all have these big beautiful hearts capable of holding it all.

Love and Light,

Dr. Cat

PS Don’t forget to Subscribe to my blog to receive more free content, videos, and practices!

About: Dr. Cathleen King, DPT is a physical therapist, transformational leader, consciousness/neuroscience educator, and a busy mom. She is the founder of Create Your Brain State™- A company dedicated to creating supportive programs for personal transformation and conscious living education. She mixes brain retraining/neuroscience, somatic practices, trauma attachment repair, personal experience, and alchemical magic into all she offers. Her superpower is helping others see the patterns that have bound them, resolve their subconscious resistance, and create transformational life changes through her mentoring and courses.

Cathleen King, DPT

I'm an expert on chronic illness, chronic trauma, relationship/attachment repair, and inner child healing. I’ve got the rare combination of in-depth doctoral-level education and training as a physical therapist, and many years of coaching others in wellness and lifestyle education. And, I have been through my own heroine’s journey of spending nearly 2 decades of my life navigating through deep, debilitating illness and finally found my way out!

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